| Hardships. Defeat. Mental Resurrection. Perseverance. Victory?
I think those words hold the most meaning in my life. I'm not sure whether to call them words, or more of a pattern of movement. I think we can all relate to them though, however it is we as individuals choose to show them. To me, I think they show my never ending pattern of repetition.
Hardships : Daily shit that fucks your head. Causing lack of clarity, depression, burnout. Hopelessness.
Defeat : That stage of giving up we, or at least I so often reach in every activity I seem to pursue.
Mental Resurrection : A spark that causes things to make sense, the Regaining of clarity, regardless of how Real or False that spark may be. Its Real to us/me at the time, and sometimes thats all thats needed to stand back up again.
Perseverance : That desperate cling to hold on to the spark of truth found, again, Regardless of the authenticity. The supply of will and hope that fuels the ability to feel connected again, a standard substance needed to complete anything originally set out to do, even if its just hanging on.
Victory? : Why the question mark? Simple. To be Unsure. Doubts, Insecurities. A 25% feeling of Victory, either in overcoming the hardships afore mentioned, or a specific task, large or small. A 75% feeling of.. did I really accomplish anything? or have I simply failed, and am too scared of admitting it. Was that truly a spark, or was it a fluke, a bastardized, stray, psuedo-modernized thought that held no more weight then that of a feather in a typhoon.? A bittersweet victory, easier described.
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I'm not sure where any of that came from, it just makes sense to me. Yes, I am a pessimist, that much is clear. I just felt like writing, and thats what I threw up from my creative, yet questionably borderline derranged mind. Its just kind of how I see things in my life and the struggles I deal with. If you liked it, then I like you. If not, then its too deep and too much for your simple mind to maintain.
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On a different note, I've been itching to reintroduce myself into drumming. If you, or anyone you know is interested in starting a band, or just playing around, get ahold of me. I am in Kaleo, but we have been taking a break, and I play guitar in that band, so when we start playing again anything else would come second. But, if you need a drummer, Leave a comment and I'll get in touch with you. I'm pretty much open to any kind of music, as I love it all, but my roots lie in punk. But again, I'll give anything a shot, I'd like to think I'm a pretty flexible drummer.
Well, thanks for reading this post. |
